When You Have a Bad Day (Part 2)

A bad day is when things in your life are turned upside down and you don’t know if you are going to be able to make it to tomorrow. On bad days we lose our job or a loved one dies. On bad days everything else in life stops because you get the worst news of your life.

In my last article we began to look at a story found in the Bible in 1 Samuel 30 that gives us insight into how we can face a bad day and come out on the other side winning instead of whining. That chapter recounts a day when David lost just about everything that was valuable to him in life—his family, his possessions and his home.

We discussed the first two things that David did when he heard that all was lost.  First, he cried. It is important not to skip the step of actually allowing yourself to feel the weight of the situation. Don’t deny your emotions, just don’t be led by them. Turn your tears into prayers. Second, he decided not to get bitter. Bitterness will kill you from the inside out. It is all about blame and the blame game won’t get you anywhere. The only real way to overcome bitterness is by deciding to forgive!

The third thing that David did was to encourage himself in God. The phrase actually comes straight from the Scripture—one translation says that he “drew strength from the Lord.” David made a decision to get his eyes off of the tragedy and put them on the only One who could truly help Him through it. In difficult times people often draw strength from sources that are ultimately destructive—unhealthy relationships, behaviors and coping mechanisms that seem to help at first but that demand a vicious payback in the end.

To draw strength from God, we begin to remind ourselves of who God is and who we are. God sees all and knows all. He has the big picture. He also loves us and ALWAYS desires the best for us. He also promises to be with those who call on His name. We, on the other hand, are small and don’t see much (let alone understand much). We need to reach out and grab a hold of Him and refuse to let go. Instead of getting mad at God and moving away from Him, we need to grab a hold of God and refuse to let go!

After David encouraged himself, he then got a word from God. In the story, he actually called for a priest to come and help him pray. He spent time in God’s presence and he came out of it knowing that God had spoken to him. We should do the same. After we have encouraged ourself and put our mind in the right place, we need to get into His Word and read and read and read. We need to get around people of faith who we know hear from the the Lord and have them encourage and pray for us. We need to spend time in prayer, both pouring our heart out to God but also listening for what He would say in return. We will discover that God will speak and He will almost always say “I am with you, I will never leave or forsake you and I will help you through this.”

The last thing that David did (and that we need to do as well) was to fight. The reason this step comes last is because we need to fight against the right enemy! Far too often we run off half cocked and start attacking the wrong people or things. But after we have met with God, we find ourselves equipped with the right tools for the job—prayer, God’s Word, praise—and we know the right direction to point the spear. And even though this step is last, it is still part of the process. Don’t just give up! If you’re alive and kicking than God’s not done with you and you need to get back into the fight.

When You Have a Bad Day (Part 1)

A bad day is when things in your life are turned upside down and you don’t know if you are going to be able to make it to tomorrow. On bad days we lose our job or a loved one dies. On bad days everything else in life stops because you get the worst news of your life. Everyone has bad days, and if you are fortunate to not have had one, chances are pretty good you will have one before too long.

Bad days happen for all kinds of reasons. Sometimes they happen because you made a decision that had negative consequences. Sometimes they are caused by other people making a terrible choice. Sometimes there’s no one to point the finger at when things happen with seemingly no rhyme or reason, it’s just because we live in a fallen world that is broken and full of sin and darkness. And sometimes bad days happen because we have an enemy—Scripture says that he prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour—who is looking for an opportunity to wreak havoc in our lives.

How do you respond when you have a bad day? Some people fall apart. Some people scream. Some people go deep and hide. But there are some people who seem to be able to walk through those difficult days and come out on the other side better. Instead of being destroyed, they are strengthened.

How do we become like these people? I believe the Bible gives us some wonderful keys for how to make it through a bad day. You can see these in the story of David found in 1 Samuel 30. That chapter recounts a day when David lost just about everything that was valuable to him in life—his family, his possessions and his home.

The first thing that David did, and that we need to do when a bad day happens in our life, is that he cried. Go ahead and cry! Don’t skip this step because you’re trying to be strong. Let the tears flow, but remember to turn your tears into a prayer. Scripture says that Jesus Himself “offered up prayer and petitions with loud cries and tears to the One who could save Him.” We would do well to follow Jesus’ example.

After we cry, or even while we are still crying, it is important that we don’t miss step two in this process. Step two is: don’t get bitter. How many times have you seen people move from mourning to blaming in the space of a single breath? There is something in all of our hearts that wants to point the finger of blame at someone and say “you did it!” Sometimes that someone is a fellow human and sometimes that someone is God Himself. Either way, when we allow ourselves to play the blame game we become bitter and resentful.

When you are bitter, it changes your whole outlook on life. You become jaded and sarcastic. You can’t enjoy life and you certainly can’t enjoy anything about the person you are bitter against (this is pretty rough when the person you are bitter against is God Himself!). I have heard it said, “bitterness is a poison you drink, hoping the other person will die.”
The antidote to bitterness is forgiveness. It’s the only cure I know. It’s the only cure that works. Forgiveness may not change the situation, but it sure will change you and your heart. It will free you from the chains that you have wrapped around your heart and you just might be able to move on from that point of pain and step into the next phase of your life.

Next time we will look at the three other steps to dealing with a bad day: encourage yourself in God, get a word from God and fight back. Until then, make a decision not to let the worst day of your life become your end, instead make it an opportunity for a new beginning.