God's Dream for Your Marriage

for The Hanford Sentinel

We all know the statistics about marriage. They say that half of all marriages end in divorce. For those that remarry, the percentage that divorce are even higher. Recent studies show that you actually increase your chances of divorce if you live together before saying "I do."

It seems that everything in our world conspires against strong marriages. We are no longer surprised when the marriages of the rich and famous blow up. Marriages that go for the long haul in Hollywood are few and far between, and it's not much better for us regular folk.

Marriage is not an easy thing, but deep down inside we all know that it is an incredibly important thing. In the Creation account in Genesis, God looks down at Adam and says, "It is not good for man to be alone." In the midst of all the wonder of creation Adam still had a vacuum in his life. God saw that emptiness and created Eve to satisfy it.

Husbands and wives need each other. There is a strength that comes from the unity of marriage. There is a satisfaction that comes from having a partner in life. And there is nothing quite like the joy that is present when the two are united and one in mind and purpose.

God is the one that thought marriage up! He did so because He knew what was best for us. Your spouse is part of the expression of God's love toward you. This also means that God is for your marriage. He wants to see you and your spouse flourish and become the people that He created you to be.

But many of us have lost hope for our marriage. We have forgotten that God is committed to us and never loses hope, even if we do. We have been hurt and we have built up walls between us and our spouse. We have said things and done things that have deeply hurt our partner. We have created messes that seem impossible to fix.

Let me encourage you, don't lose hope. Don't settle for less than what God wants to see in your marriage. Don't just "get by". God can take even the worst, most impossible situation and make it into a thing of wonder. He not only can, but He loves to! The moments when God shines through the brightest are when we have reached the end of our rope and don't know where else to turn.

He can revitalize a broken marriage. He can breathe love back into a cold heart. He can help you learn how to love and forgive. He can break strongholds of bitterness and open channels of communication.

God is committed to your marriage, are you? Will you believe that He can help you? Will you dare to hope once again? The road might be long and the path difficult, but He is willing to be there every step of the way.

The pastors in Kings County would love to help you see God's dream for your marriage. In their toolboxes, they have counseling resources, classes, and so much more. You've tried other things, why don't you give God a chance?

Tired of Idiotic Laws? Let's Try This

Forget about the concept of a town hall meeting to decide public policy. How about this instead? In Ancient Greece, to prevent idiotic statesmen from passing idiotic laws upon the people, lawmakers--legend has it--were asked to introduce all new laws while standing on a platform with a rope around their neck. If the law passed, the rope was removed. If it failed, the platform was removed.

Quality Press, August, 1992.

Pay Up Already!

Romans 13:8 gives us some incredibly practical advice when it says, "Owe nothing to anyone—except for your obligation to love one another. If you love your neighbor, you will fulfill the requirements of God’s law."

The first thing we see in this verse is that we are to owe nothing to anyone. This simply means we need to pay our debts. As Americans, we have a terrible habit of getting ourselves into financial debt. The Scriptures say that the debtor is the slave to the lender. How well most of us know that feeling! Every day as we head off to work, we are spurred on by the pressing realization that, if we don't, our creditors—our credit card company, our mortgage company, our furniture store, our home improvement store, our car loan—will hound and harass us until we pay up. We have handed our freedom over because of our inability to say "no" to our list of wants.

But it is not only money that we owe. We have made promises and commitments. We have given our word. We have said things and our utterances have become promissory notes that remain outstanding and require payment. Too often we let things slide off our tongue without realizing that we are actually creating emotional and relational debt. If we do not "pay up" then we leave a wreckage of relationships scattered in our wake.

The second thing we see is there is a debt we can never hope to repay in its entirety. It is a debt we will pay on for the rest of our life. This debt is our call to love others. We owe it because of Jesus Christ's love for us. His love makes it possible for us to once again have a relationship with Father God. He gave His life that we might have life, both in the here and now and also forever into eternity.

Paying off our financial debts is a piece of cake compared to this debt. To love others requires us to put others first. It requires us to set aside our personal wishes and put the wishes of another in their place. It requires us to die to our selfish desires and motives.

Choosing to really love other people is the hardest thing you will ever do.

Love requires us to forgive again and again.
Love demands that we see others with God's eyes.
Love screams self-sacrifice.
Love is tough.

You and I are not here on this planet just for ourselves. If we spend our lives seeking our personal goals and fulfilling all of our desires, then we will come to the end of our lives empty and we will walk into the next world sorely lacking. Real happiness can only be obtained if our goal is not happiness in itself. Don't seek happiness, seek service and you will find happiness on the way.

It's time for all of us to pay up. As we do, we will suddenly find that we have "fulfill[ed] the requirements of God's law".